Browsing All posts tagged under »marital conflict«

Critical Mass

August 6, 2020


One of the tricky points of conflict to handle is when one partner is distressed about the other’s weight (that is, when one is critical of the other’s mass).  It is even a thorny issue to write about.  I will try to do it justice in 1000 words or less. First, you can’t control your […]


November 16, 2016


Confabulation, Confabulation, It’s making me late. It’s keeping me waiting. (Okay, that’s not quite what Carly Simon wrote.) About five or six years ago, I quit buying books in print and switched over to an e-reader.  On the whole, I like it a lot better.  I don’t have to deal with the accumulation of books […]


October 20, 2015


Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor.  Romans 13:7 Show proper respect to everyone. 1 Peter 2:17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Romans 12:17 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, […]

The Demon Dialogues Revisited: Mommy and Me

February 5, 2015


About three years ago, I did a series of posts on Recognizing the Demon Dialogues.  These ideas were not original to me, but were coming from the work of Sue Johnson who is the theorist who developed Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy.  Essentially, the demon dialogues are patterns of interaction that couples fall into that devastate […]

Vantage Point

January 23, 2015


A few years back, the film Vantage Point told the story of an attempted assassination from the view point of different characters.  As the story unfolds, the viewer sees the same events multiple times, but from different views.  Each character’s perspective provides a different understanding of the events until the viewer gets the full picture […]

An Explanation is Not an Apology

September 5, 2013


‘Sorry’ seems to be the hardest word.  Elton John/Bernie Taupin It’s hard for me to say ‘I’m sorry.’  Peter Cetera/David Foster Is that how you apologize? ‘cause you suck at it.  Erin Brokovich[1] Apologizing can be difficult.  There can be a number of reasons for this.  For some, apologies were never modeled in their family […]

Stay and Fight

May 23, 2013


There is a love that never fails.  There is a healing that always prevails.  There is a hope that whispers a vow, a promise to stay while we’re working it out.  Sara Groves For once in your life, here’s your miracle.  Stand up and fight.  Kenny Loggins This post would have seemed more appropriate about […]