Browsing All posts tagged under »vulnerability«

Reassuring the More Vulnerable Partner

July 13, 2020


We all go into close relationships with two basic questions: 1) Am I loveable? 2) Are you safe for me?  Humans, not being binary but somewhere on a continuum between extremes, are somewhere between a “yes” and a “no” on these questions.  If we took an internal family systems approach, we might say that there […]

Trusting Iris

March 19, 2015


I got to visit France for the first time last year.  My wife and I traveled with my sister and my brother-in-law.  I like traveling with them.  Part of that, of course, is that we all get along well.  The other part is that my brother-in-law loves to plan the trips (where we will go, […]

Sexual Addiction: Intimacy Disorder

July 22, 2014


Behavior Disorder Brain Disorder Sexual addiction is a(n) Intimacy Disorder Profound Boundary Failure A Family of Origin Disorder Relationship Disorder Courtship Disorder Trauma Response Way of Managing Shame Dysfunctional Emotional Regulation Strategy In male culture, a common fixture is the put-down. This can be used as a show of camaraderie, can indicate acceptance into a […]

Attachment and Intimacy

October 31, 2013


To provide some context, this post is adapted from a recent talk I gave to a group of leaders of Christian sexual addiction recovery support groups.  My portion (the more academic section) was followed by my colleagues, Andrew Last speaking on “Creating a Culture of Connection” in the support group and Treina Nash speaking on […]